Of Time and Tide....

Ah, it's been a month since my last entry, how time flies....
With time comes the inevitable change....
Yet some things remain the same....
Some things, refuse to succumb to the changing tides....
Though it's easier to remain ignorant....
When the receding tide drifts further away from the shore....
There remains the fool, with his foot, longing for the waves....
And as time passes, he begins to accept that he has lost the wave....
But gradually the inevitable truth becomes crystal clear, like the wave, the heart he so longs for was never his to begin with...

xoxo

Of Changes

The impending change is inevitable,
I see it, taking shape, right before my eyes,
For good or for bad,
I still can't figure it out yet,
The thing that's for sure,
Is that it's coming.

xoxo

Of Hearts and Sleeves

You wear your heart on your sleeve,
expecting, waiting, longing,
Hoping someone would catch it from the ever unrolling fragile fabric,
unrolling, unraveling, falling,
Suddenly realizing there might not be a saving arm,
what to do, how to do it,
Catch your falling heart and roll up your own sleeve,
independence, sovereignty, liberty,
For sometimes the person you long for can in no way be yours,
acceptance, though it hurts like hell,
What's left is a groove for your arm in my heart,
forever, always

xoxo

Of Gravity

"Gravity"

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your reign.

Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.

You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you're everything I think I need here on
The ground.
But you're neither friend nor foe though I can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down

Sara Barreilles
Currently in love with her...

With this entry, may I leave the emo behind
Or at least, from this space
My feelings, shall remain my own

xoxo

Of Concerns and Gratitudes

Ah, hey peeps,

It's been a very eventful pass few weeks...I know I've been awfully emo this pass few entries...
And I'm utterly grateful for all your concerns! Thanks yeah!! And I'm well, seriously, it's just been a rather taxing few weeks...
It feels like I've been on an emotional roller-coaster that, frankly speaking, I don't think has reached a halt yet. Riding through the highs, through the darkest of places, on a journey, of which it's destination I'm yet to know, or rather, I refuse to find out. For which the reason, is difficult to disclose! Maybe because of fear, maybe because of insecurities, maybe because of naivety, I don't know. What's true lies within yourself, but yet, what truly lies within you?! When it comes down to it, only you know how you feel! And here comes the hardest part of that truth, when and how do you tell the world or that someone how you feel?
For we are all governed by circumstances that bind us to the life that we live in, may it be the life we chose for ourselves, or chosen for us. Either way, it is forsaken, this life!


xoxo

Of Falling

My dear,

After all that's been said and done, if you still feel the same, then so be it!
For I sit here in silence, and hear the echoes of who I used to be!
And I wonder, "How did I become this person?"
Yet the answer is simple, simple enough it's a shame to utter out loud...

xoxo

The Mind is Tired, but The Heart Won't Quit....

Hey peeps,

How ya'll been?! Alright then, moving on....
Ahhh, where do I start? Been feelin' kinda crappy lately....
Have you ever felt like the "happy" things in your life never lasts?? Yet, even though they are short-lived, you appreciate it so freakin much? Sometimes, even trivial things matter so damn much!
My good friend once told me, people will always hurt you. At that time I thought it was the booze in him talking...looking back though, the booze was right! Isn't it funny how simple words, some actions, even mere choices the people you like make, affects you so? When it feels like you come in second best! Ah, the jealousy runs wild!!
So what do you do when stuck in such a place? When you've fallen, too deep to climb out, too early to quit!
Am I a hopeful person in a hopeless situation?